Yes, unfortunately, divorce is as common as birth and death these days, but that does not stop the injury that women suffer after they've matured to a level where their value is dependent upon their marital union, only to have it dissolve like sand running through her now empty splayed hands.
- What becomes important after this? Healing, of course.
- What is the next step? Preserving this woman's worth, of course.
- But isn't she still wounded; scarred? Yes, of course.
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| Nhat Crawford, author |
Grace.
It is an enabler; it empowers. It is not just something whereby you are forgiven for some sin you will no doubt commit while in a low place. When I think about the period of time Jesus walked the earth, he was obviously fairly good looking, owned his own business, was a top-notch public speaker, was extremely confident in himself, his purpose and his God, and hung around women as often as he did men, I'm impressed that he still did not miss his mark. His life and focus is a testament to how Grace works. I truly believe that Grace becomes a main ingredient for the recovery of the wounded woman because her worth is still in tact, but she can scarcely see it anymore. She no longer sees it as the thing necessary to live out her purpose. Jesus, the great example, was covered with the grace of his father, our father God Almighty and it kept him focused no matter what life threw at him.
There are many things that await a mature woman who was otherwise ready and eager to hit the ground running once her house... her nest becomes empty. They vary from new enlightening opportunities to miserable failures. She could venture out on a new career, a business, a ministry, even a lucrative hobby. Her confidence is high and her husband will back her. Hallelujah! Or not. See, she never planned on being single this time in life. When discouragement comes, too often self worth goes riding out on the back of newly formed wounds. This does not have to be. A mature woman needs to be a wise women, traumatized, or not.
Wisdom.
After a few years into Grey Singleness I was nearly completely convinced that I could not possibly live out what was in the Bible. Proverbs and Psalms became comforting and the only instructor I had, at least; but it just wouldn't pay the darn rent, or buy groceries! I was getting frightened and feeling less and less like the vision I'd always seen of myself. The vision I'd always believed I was born to live out. I'd also begun to feel like all the great prophesies over my life drifted off to another. How could I be the woman spoken of in these prophetic frames? I longed to be a woman of Wisdom. The Bible had told me somewhere that Wisdom came by asking. I'd asked and asked. I begged, even. No Wisdom. Then low and behold I learned something. As empty as I was after the agony of divorce I was prime to be filled with something else. Surely I could be filled with Wisdom now, right? Not really. Not yet because my method wasn't working. Perhaps my attitude was off? No, my knowledge was!
Remember, I'd lamented that the Bible just wasn't cutting it for me anymore (it's amazing what wounds and discouragement will do). In more recent days as my woes of divorce are a distant memory, I now know that Jesus studied the word, was filled to the brim with it, then BECAME it. He became Wisdom! A wounded spirit cries. Let it cry for Wisdom then give it want it wants: Read it, be Filled with it, Become it.
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